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40 Funny Things To Write In a Leaving Card

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Check out my guide of 40 Funny Things To Write In a Leaving Card

Brought to you by TeePee Creations, gifts that guarantee them giggles.

For General Goodbyes

These funny things to write in a leaving card will get your friends and family giggling.

  • See ya later, alligator!
  • Catch you on the flip side!
  • Out to the door, dinosaur!
  • See you soon, raccoon!
  • No talking to strangers and lock your doors!
  • See ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya!
  • Bye, Felicia!
  • Until next millennia!
  • Oh, and in case I don’t see you—good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight!
  • You know you love me, XOXO!
  • Goodbyes are not the end. Do not, even for a second, believe that you’ll never pay for my meals again.
  • I’ll say goodbye, only if you promise to bring me expensive gifts when you return.
  • Goodbye my friend, I hope our paths cross again… so I can punch you for leaving me in the first place!
  • Oh, you’re going… who will I make fun of now? Bye!
  • Finally!!! We’ve been waiting for this day for a long time. Farewell sucker.

Check out some funny leaving cards here to put your funny messages inside.


Write these funny phrases in your co-workers leaving card to get them in fits of laughter.

  • Great to hear that you’re going away. I can’t wait to hear that you have been crowned as the “gossip queen” at the workplace. Goodbye!
  • How much more money are they giving you? Write that number down. Double it. Throw the paper away. I don’t have that kind of money, but I can bribe you with brownies, my delightful smile, jokes, and my friendship. Reconsider staying!
  • Thank you for your cooperation. Farewell.
  • Goodluck finding better coworkers than me! Goodbye.
  • Finally! I’ll be able to get back to doing my job properly now that a bad influence like you is leaving. Goodbye!
  • Can’t believe you’re going! Who will make me my coffee now?
  • I can’t believe you’re leaving! I hope you fail at your new job. See ya soon!
  • I used to hate work, then you came, now you’re leaving I am back to hating work. Thanks!
  • Let’s hope your boss isn’t as bad as this one
  • Who is going to be able to keep up with me at work drinks? I need a new drinking partner
  • It’s sad to see you go, but you did have the best desk and I’ll look after it well
  • How much money are they paying you? I’ll pay you to stay.
  • Not sure what to write since I’ll still see you on the weekends…

Check out some funny co-worker new job cards here to put your funny messages inside.


These funny things to write in a leaving card for retirement are sure to get your co-worker giggling.

  • You’re retiring! I may be jealous, but mostly just happy for you. Congrats!
  • What do you call a person who is happy on Monday? Retired. Congratulations!
  • You now have two more best friends! Their names are Couch and Television. I think you’ll be spending a lot of time with them throughout your retirement.
  • Now it’s time for you to learn how to make your own coffee! Congratulations on your retirement!
  • Your new job is to make sure you have a wonderful time in retirement. The workdays are flexible and you have total authority over your schedule!
  • Are you going away because of the layoff notice you heard will be out soon? But wait, you’re not included in the list of mediocre workers that we’re weeding out soon. Anyway, the only thing we’re going to miss is gossiping together. I wish you good luck and success!
  • Goodbye tension and hello pension! Congratulations from all of us to one well-deserving retiree.
  • Welcome to retirement, where every day feels like the weekend, and soon you’ll forget what day it is!
  • You will learn how to master doing nothing!
  • Have you found something useful? Now you can never write a boring message inside a leaving card.
  • Enjoy old age, fragile bones & a weak bladder

Check out some funny retirement cards here to put your funny messages inside.

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